In the last few days, I've realized something about myself. I'm even more selfish than I thought. Let me explain. My lovely Laina and her family are no longer coming to my church. Not only do I hate this because I won't get to see her every Sunday anymore.. and let's face it y'all.. some weeks she's kinda my life source (that came out creepier than I meant it...). But I have another reason. I reason that I didn't think anyone would realize, but my mom hit the nail right on the head when we were talking the other day.
I'm scared of being left behind. She's now going to a church with a lot of kids, unlike the one that I still go to. I realize that this is normal.. everyone is afraid of losing their best friends, but I guess it's hitting me harder than most because I feel like I'm losing all three of mine. My Abbys are moving away, and now this?? Come on God. Why bless me with some of the best friends on this entire earth and then rip them away from me???
But it goes deeper than this (though that was the meat of what breaks my heart).. you see.. Laina is the first friend , let alone best friend, I've ever had that never really had anyone but me. I love my Abbys, but they've always been surrounded by lots of friends. There something really special in knowing someone really does need you. I can't help but admit that I'm terrified of how things my change. I can't fully express how my heart feels right now.. and I'm not sure I'd want to subject you to it..
Anyways... Enough about how pathetic my life is right now.. Today is Miss Kezley's first birthday! (My first post ever about her)
All Photo credit goes to Becky Mae Boyle (Kezley's Mama)
If you don't think she's adorable.. then clearly you haven't a heart. I wish so much that I could hug and kiss her today! Lala (me) misses her sweet little Kez!
Shalom,
I understand what it's like to feel like you're losing your friends, trust me. But if you and Laina are really truly best friends then even though she's at a different church you will still han out and still be friends and still talk on the phone and confide in each other. Believe me. I live in Idaho and my best friend moved to Texas but we still have Facebook. We still have texting. And I was lucky enough to be able to come down for a visit. Also, even though it may be a change, God has a reason for this. He has a reason for everything. It is meant to help grow you and stretch you for Him. Chin up pretty girl, life is an adventure.
ReplyDeleteOh Natalie.. Thank you for this... You made me cry. You're so right. So so so freaking right. Thank you for being you.
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