Thursday, April 9, 2015

I'm not who I used to be


  I find myself in kind of a strange place. I've come so far. The joy and purpose I carry is incredible. Slowly but surely I'm walking with my head held higher as I'm filled with more confidence. 
See, but where I struggle isn't with my physical appearance. It's not with doubt of my dreams coming true. 
I struggle to be confident in who I am as a person today. I often catch myself knocking myself. Y'all... That's not healthy. I mean, I'm super flawed. I screw up and all that, everyday, but does that mean that's all I am? 
If I can't be confident that my intentions are good and my heart is God's, today, how can I hope to be a good wife and mom when the time comes? How can I hope to make a difference when I can't be confident in the person God made me to be. 

God made me to stand tall. 
He made me to be a leader. 
He made me to be different. 
He made me to be me and no one else. 

Why is that so hard to grasp? 
Why can't I get it through my head that God himself wants me to be confident. Not just in Him, but in ME. 
That blows my mind. I mean, who am I? 
Well... God knows, and He seems to have confidence in me. And for me, that counts for a lot. 
Oh yall.. It's a journey, but I'm growing, and that's what's important. 

Shalom,

1 comment:

  1. it's a tough trick to learn to look at your flaws and exhale as you let them go. i haven't mastered that myself even. i think probably you never will - it will just always be an effort to remind yourself that everyone has shortcomings and misgivings and that that's perfectly okay because we are all humans.

    someday it will get easier. at least, that's what i keep hearing.

    ReplyDelete

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