When you've been hurt as much as I have.... It's not an easy thing to let go of such things. Pain festers and infects and causes problems. For me, it's given me a short and fiery temper. It's something I'm working desperately on, but oh it's so hard.
It's so hard to control vicious out bursts.
I don't say this to complain. More so.... To explain.
I'm not a cruel person. I'm actually kinda nice.... Unless you're one of my best friends, and in that case, my meanness is out of love... I swear it.
Cruelty comes out of my outbursts, at times, I fear. But it honestly isn't personal.
I'm a broken person. My heart is in pieces. Which means I'm rather rough around the edges at times. But God is working on me. He's the light which shines through me. A light that I pray will begin to shine brighter and brighter and more and more often.
I'm sorry, if you've been on the wrong end of my sharpness.
In other news, God has been instilling in me, that my plan doesn't matter. It's natural that I plan. It's important infact, but I must submit that plan to God and be happy about what He does with it. He has a plan for life. A plan full of hope. A plan for good things and not bad.
Do you have any idea how amazing that is? I don't have to worry about my life.... God has it...